The First Time
I lost my virginity to a vampire.
Not a vampire really, but someone
who sucked blood out of me like one.
It was much better than the first time, too.
The time I lost my real virginity, with blood
all over my party dress. This time I wanted to.
I said yes, let’s do this. I came prepared
with a belly full of peanut butter instead
of champagne. I didn’t even flinch
when poked. No, I just looked
at my notifications stone-cold sober,
rather than the roof of his car,
fading in and out of drunkenness.
I did experience a touch of lightheadedness
as I squeezed the ball, in and out every few
seconds; but it was nothing compared
to a full-moon psyched asshole werewolf
humping me in a church parking lot.
Against my will. After puking my guts out,
after making it clear I wanted to wait.
No, this time it was everything I expected,
this first time donating blood.